I hate it when timing in life is not ideal. I hate looking back on life and feeling stupid about things. Most of all, I hate obsessing over those things and not being able to move forward.
Why doesn't it make sense? Why do I feel like all my dreams were shattered? Why is it that what made sense doesn't make sense anymore?
I need to rebuild. I need to come to terms with the fact that life isn't what I thought it would be. I need to let go of the anger and sadness.
I am lucky that I don't have those urges to kill myself, despite the fact I've given up on life right now. I'm lucky things are afloat.
Do you know what you've done to me? Do you know what I'm doing to myself? Do you know what I think now? Do you even care?
Incoherent babblings that only make sense to me can be soothing. I need to sustain the catharsis